LauraElizaHaynes
Ruminating
Often it comes
Attempts at self mastery
The Wise can settle
Into the cacophony within
Grasp released
Annihilation ambition put down
In favour of restful awareness
Watching…
Anxiety’s apprehension
Recognising….
Melancholy’s malaise
Realising…
Doubt’s discomfort
Knowing their transience
How they dissolve when left alone
How they grow and morph when probed
Yes I am pondering
Why I secretly covet misery
Fearful of peace
Virtually spent
Clouds part allowing sun’s warmth
To lift weary soul
Weary
Problems abound
Constantly eroding
Once resilient defences
Weary
Futility tempts overwhelm
Foundations remain firm
Still holding fast
Weary
As you can tell I am weary but I am refusing to quit, despite how tempting it is.
This is a Butterfly Cinquain 9 line syllabic poem that runs, 2,4,6,8,2,86,4,2.
You will endure this,
You will prevail!
You can weather this storm,
That batters down your peace of mind.
You feel no more, can be lost,
Ripped from moorings considered sound.
But hold fast!
This will pass,
And from the wreckage you will emerge.
Too rise and rebuild.
All that’s needed,
Is to believe you can.
This is a Verse Epistle inspired by Sanaa’s dVerse prompt – take a look and perhaps give it a go yourself. This form is a letter in verse. This Verse Epistle was based on a poem I wrote to myself this week, to help me to keep going. I hope you find it helpful.
Wise Within Our has been Species, tell us. Life's arrows have tailspin! Unavoidably they pierce us. So from repercussions we must adjust, And can protect, shielding from a sorrowful vice. At such times find resilience we must. But also guard against, be just, Mind arrows under-spin These do not trust. Don't let in, Not kin - Lies
So this is a diatelle, a poetry form that I found frustrating and enjoyable all at the same time! The syllable structure of the diatelle is as follows: 1/2/3/4/6/8/10/12/10/8/6/4/3/2/1, (15 lines) and has a set rhyme pattern of abbcbccaccbcbba. The Diatelle form was created by Bradley Vrooman.
I felt I wanted to talk about how, although life can ‘shoot’ at us, we also have a tendency to ‘shoot’ at ourselves again and again by how we relate to what has happened. This is encapsulated by the Parable of the two arrows from the Buddhist cannon:
The Buddha once asked a student,
‘If a person is struck by an arrow, is it painful? If the person is struck by a second arrow, is it even more painful?’
He then went on to explain,
‘In life, we can’t always control the first arrow. However, the second arrow is our reaction to the first. This second arrow is optional.’
And just in case you’re still a bit confused here’s a short explainer.
Terrible thought surged
– loss overwhelmed.
Defences were breached
– tearful deluge.
A battle was fought
– composure found.
Calm balance hard won
– sadness settled.
Myself I picked up
– and peace regained.
This week was difficult, bad news spurned a shattering thought; that tipped the balance of my already stressed mind. Proud though, as although I wobbled, I found my footing and kept going!
A haiku distills thinking and I have been writing a good deal recently. Largely as part of Twitter engagement (@lauraelizahay). Here is my Haiku Cascade!
Don’t try to solve life
Probing makes it elusive
Like sand through fingers
“Will I be okay?”
The prayer of all who suffer
If resolve nurtured…
Torpor overtakes
Enveloped in down’s soft warmth
Sleep submerges mind
Slipped into the night
Freedom from glib exclusive
Found the kind and wise
Eventide’s light plays
Dancing through canopy’s boughs
I sigh lost in dreams
Do try for the light
End slumbering in darkness
World waits for your sight
Signs of spring
Life’s grace returning
Warm wind blows
Expect doubt
Life’s harsh leveller
Ego’s foe
In days aftermath
To myself I am unkind
To the achieved blind
To be a hermit
Deep in the woods, riverside
Only lost can find
A community
Of photo-synthesisers
Capturing the light
Like a mountain lake
Clearer, direction once was
Now muddy puddle!
Encouragement is
The act of lending courage
To the fearful heart.
Prophet Hicks was right
Human life’s machinations
Are all ‘just a ride’
Phew if you made it here you have serious commitment!
Thank you.
Waves of despair Consume the peace so rare. Relentlessly Frustration crashes, must flee. All consuming Terrors and worries, mind sinking. Reach for the sane Only to be enveloped, once again. Crest of bitter lessons Tide keeps on, doesn't lessen. Calm does lie below Equanimity can ride the flow.
This poem reflects the challenge of this week. As it has been like sailing through a storm. But instead of weather a constant barrage of frustrations and a burgeoning to-do list of intractable problems! Sure this is something you can empathise with as doubt I am alone.
Too often we are our own worst critic.
An internal voice that spews derision.
Inflicting on psyche a deep incision.
Way of being corrosive, acidic.
–
I wonder if its possible to shift?
To fight for ourselves, speak up for our cause.
Seek to defend and vigorously applaud.
Champion our good, steer us when we drift.
So this is for Eugi’s weekly prompt – this week its ‘Champion’, check it out. It inspired me to think about champion not as a ‘winner’ but in its meaning to ‘advocate’, for another or a cause, and then ultimately for how we can be our own champion.
Tetchiness hiding deep sadness,
Nearly overwhelmed.
Melancholy’s pit came close.
But I saw its approach!
It was tempting to jump in.
Its monochrome space,
Is comforting, safe.
But its bleak views,
and the hard climb out,
Stayed my leap.
This week has been a struggle as my mind has been melancholy. I have been gripped before like this and found myself in the ‘pit’, which basically meant putting my existence on pause, which is not as pleasant as it sounds. I have learnt to see the pit approaching and do all I can not to dive in. As it is better, in the long run, to struggle through topside. Than to have to break the miserable thought cycle and muster the energy to climb out. But if you are in the pit right now, I understand and I promise you are not alone.
